“Mami, how did my father die?”

“Mami, how did my father die?”

“Mami, how did my father die?”

I remember always wondering and practicing over and over in my head how and what I would response to that. Now the day has come and it caught me by surprise. My 10-year-old wanted to know what happened to her father 9 years ago. Dios Mio!!! Help me, guide me!!! Do I lie to her? Do I tell her he was ill or that he was in a tragic accident?  Or do I tell her the ugly truth that her dad was viciously killed by a low life piece of shit!? How would the truth affect her future and her views? How would she feel and what would she think? The moment I heard those 5 words come out her mouth I felt that my life stopped? 

The day has come and I must face one of my biggest fear. I decided to go with the truth. I told her exactly what happened although I was afraid of how she would take it. I felt my voice change and I felt a strength that I have never felt before. I would never erase the look in her eyes of disappointment and her words "Wow Mami there are a lot of horrible people in this world." What do I say to that? That was one of the worries I had. I didn't want her to feel afraid to then start limiting herself to the world and all the beautiful things it has to offer because of fear. I tried explaining to her the importance of choosing who you hang out with and who you consider as "your friend". I try explaining to her the importance of understanding right from wrong. I tried telling and explaining to her in an age appropriate way all these concerns. I didn't want to over expose her and create more fear and worries but instead I wanted her to feel the need to be aware. Aware of her circle and her actions. 


I do not know if I said the right things or even if I said enough but as her mom I just told her what I thought was necessary and right. I can't erase her feelings but I can definitely be her support system. As a parent we try to do everything possible to protect, guide and shelter our kids for a world that isn't always so nice. But at the end of the day we can simply just pray and try our best to build strong individuals who has a sense of respect for life.

You might not have gone through exactly this but sometimes we are faced with having difficult conversations with our children that shape their views on the world. I hope this helps you gain strength and guidance when confronted with such a challenge.

Co-Parenting: Let's make the best out of this.

Co-Parenting: Let's make the best out of this.

The Human Cow

The Human Cow

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